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OK HERE WE GO
THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR
THE COMPLETE VERSION OF THE AMITYVILLE 2 FUNNY STUFF LIST
HAVE FUN!!
In order to help you with my strange sense of humour I have included images, sounds & movies from the film
To access them simply click the appropiate graphic next to the example from the movie
- Screen
Grab
- .mp3 File
- Movie
File
Amityville 2 - The Possession
0:00:00 - Roll Intro Credits 
0:01:46 - Look at Mr Montelli's face when he is driving to the house, I think that's the only time that he smiles in the whole of the film, and even then he looks really sadistic (also notice that his lips aren't moving as he talks)
0:01:59 - Mr Montelli lifts up Mark and says "Wadda Ya Think
MONTELLI?", what a strange thing to say.
0:02:03 - Look at Mr Montelli's face as he turns away, he looks like a pig (jodi the pig?)
0:02:15 - Look at how Mr Montelli chucking the for sale sign on the floor, making a mess of his new garden
0:02:23 - Watch Mr Montelli scolding his kids for being near
the pond (he sounds like a drill sergeant)
0:02:43 - Mrs Montelli's excitement about her new house (be
it ever SO..)
0:03:03 - Mr Montelli being a bastard already, Mrs Montelli
telling Trish to be respectful
0:03:15 - Mr Montelli getting ready to have a go at Sonny 
0:03:26 - Sonny says "BRRRM WOOO" (Then Mr Montelli has a go
at Sonny for no reason)
0:04:07 - Jan Montelli showing bizzare excitement about the
staircase
0:04:29 - Mrs Montelli saying "They're Nailed!", It sounds like
she is saying "Inhaled"
0:04:57 - Look at Trish Montelli's hairy top lip
0:05:19 - Why would Mrs Montelli suddenly laugh when the blood
from the tap goes back to water, I'd shit myself. 
0:05:26 - Mr Montelli smacks Jan for very little reason (maybe an ad-lib!)
0:05:32 - When Mr Montelli rubs his face it looks like his face is melting
0:05:38 - Mr Montelli throws a nail to the floor, He seems determined to turn the place into a pigsty
0:06:15 - Sonny uses the torch as a microphone and says "No
nails here, over"
0:07:24 - Mrs Montelli says "oh those are my husbands guns"
0:07:43 - Rutyana Alda's bad acting (oh..HUH!),
Notice also that the fabric of her blouse makes it look like it was painted on afterwards
0:07:55 - Look at Mrs Montelli's face as she hands the torch to the removal man.
0:08:21 - Look at how Mrs Montelli is staring at the removal man as he looks in the cellar.
0:08:40 - Look at how the removal man manages to get a big cobweb wrapped around his head as he waves his arms about, ha ha ha
0:08:44 - The "famous" "THERE" speech, listen to how many times Mrs Montelli and the removal man say the word "there" in this bit of the film.
Mrs Montelli:"Come on out of THERE, Oh my goodness are you alright?"
Removal Man: "Yeah !"
Mrs Montelli : "Oh, What Happened ?, What is that on your shirt ?..."
Removal Man:"Shit, excuse me ma'am..THERE's a lot of flies, a lot of mud, a lot of everything in THERE, if I was you I'd stay out of THERE."
Mrs Montelli:"Oh I'm sorry I had you go in THERE!"
0:10:00 - Mrs Montelli pulls a funny face when "the fingers
touched my arm" as she would say. 
0:10:39 - Look at Mrs Montelli's face when Sonny startles her
0:10:50 - Mrs Montelli says "Somebody....touched me-ee-ee"
0:11:26 - Look at how Mark Montelli goes to stab his sister with a fork as they lay the table.
0:11:42 - Look at how Mr Montelli shrugs when Mrs Montelli says
"I think we're a very lucky family"
0:12:18 - Look at Mr Montelli's face when Trish is trying to stop him having a go at Sonny, He looks like he wants to murder her.
0:12:37 - Rutyana Alda (Mrs Montelli) screws up her line, ("I've
had enough of it....with you!")
0:15:33 - Mr Montelli opens the front door and says "They're
better be a good...OK ha ha ha...ha ha"
0:15:52 - Look at how Mr Montelli looks angrily at his wife before he runs off (like an ape i might add) to get his gun.
0:16:07 - How does Mr Montelli make this strange wheezing noise
....
...before he says "Ok..I see ya THERE...THERE's a twelve guage
shotgun waiting for a-anybody trespassin'", also his face looks really funny
when he makes the weird noise.
Can anybody recreate this wheezing noise that Mr Montelli makes in this part, I've tried and I can't do it, nor can anyone I know
0:17:09 - Watch Mark Montelli when the windows are slamming up and down, he looks like he's having a fit or something.
0:17:27 - The choir music in this part (when Mr Montelli sees
the painting on the wall) sounds like the lyrics are "Give me your toe,
Supper for Heebee, Give me your toast"
0:17:59 - When Jan Montelli tels Mrs Montelli what happened,
look at Mark Montelli, he points and then wobbles his head around in a really
strange way, this is why he has earned the nickname"Wobble-Head". 
0:18:15 - Look at Mr Montelli's face when he pulls his belt
from the belt loops on his trousers. He grimaces in a funny way.
0:18:27 - This bit of dialogue is dead funny, not only does
Mrs Montelli act really badly when she says "don't touch her, don't you touch
her", If you listen closely you can hear Mr Montelli call her "a F**king
C*nt".
0:18:38 - Mrs Montelli clawing her hands and saying "I'll kill
YOU, I'll kill YOU, YOU". Why did she repeat the same phrase twice in one
sentence?, also listen to how she is making funny wheezing noises as she crosses
the hall.
0:18:47 - When Mrs Montelli is clawing Mr Montelli's face she looks exactly like Geddy Lee from Rush"
0:20:09 - The demonic voice saying "Why didn't you pull the
trigger, Why didn't you SHOOT that pig?" (not really funny as such, but very
quoteable)
0:21:24 Look at the way Mr Montelli just stares at Father Adamski
when he introduces himself.
0:21:36 Look at how excited Mrs Montelli is to see Father Adamski e.g.
Mrs Montelli : "Have you met my husband"
Father Adamski : "Yes, we've just met"
Mrs Montelli : "Oh GOOD!"
0:21:45 Look at how Father Adamski is smiling as he walks into the sitting room.
0:22:09 Look at how Mr Montelli drags Mrs Montelli away by her arm and she tries to smile at Father Adamski even though it is blatantly obvious to everyone in the room that he is really pissed off at her.
0:22:18 Listen to how Mr Montelli doesn't care if Father Adamski
can hear him when he shouts at his wife about bringing a priest into their
house, and at how Mrs Montelli is desperate to make him shut up.
0:23:01 Listen to how Mr Montelli offers Father Adamski a cigar
by saying "Wanna smoke, Priest?", even though he had been introduced to him
minutes before and knew what his name was.
0:23:14 Look at how Mr Montelli points at Father Adamski when
he says "See if PRIEST wants a drink".
0:23:28 Why does Jan put a plastic bag over Marks head, those
kids must be psycho's, attempted stabbings with forks and suffocations and
it's only about 20 mins into the film, no wonder there's a diabolical presence
in the house with those two little maniacs running around.
0:23:44 Listen to how Mrs Montelli introduces Sonny as her "first-born",
would she introduce Trish as her "second-born"?, also watch how she tries
to stroke his hair as he walks towards Father Adamski.
0:24:15 The most infamous (at least in my eyes) scene in the whole movie.
Mr Montelli: "Jesus H Christ, What do you kids think this house is, a playground?"
Jan Montelli: "But we didn't do it"
Mr Montelli: "Don't you lie to me!" < WHACK >
Father Adamski: "Please don't hit that child!"
Mr Montelli: "Mister this isn't your business, you hear that!,
I raise my children the way I see fit, now you do what you gonna do then go
!"
Notice at the end of this scene how Mr Montelli glares at the priest like he's the one who did something wrong when he's the guy who just slapped his daughter across the face. Also notice how Sonny is just standing there on the far left of the screen just staring at the wall, he seemed to rush in quickly enough when Mr Montelli hit Mrs Montelli, Mr Montelli hitting Jan across the face probably didn't seem like an unjustified thing to do in Sonny's eyes.
This scene is (IMHO) the most quoteable scene in the whole movie, and the whole scene from when Father Adamski enters the house is probably the most memorable part of Amityville 2 in my small circle of friends who enjoy the film on the same level (ok make that ONE friend!)
0:24:38 Look at how Mrs Montelli is desperate for Father Adamski
to stay, even though he has every right to leave seeing that Mr Montelli was
rude to him ever since he arrived and went on to beat up his kids in front
of a clergyman.
0:26:08 Notice how Mr Montelli still doesn't think he has done anything wrong when his wife tries to get him to apologise to Father Adamski for his behaviour.
0:26:34 Look how pissed off Mr Montelli looks as he walks out of the house to apologise
0:27:15 Why does Trish say that Sonny said that he wasn't feeling well, when he didn't say a word to her and just walked upstairs when he was asked if he wanted to go to the church ?
0:37:55 Trish Montelli remarks on how she doesn't think that
"Mommy wants to make love to Daddy anymore". I mean let's be honest,
No woman with any degree of sense would want to sleep with a man that hits
her, hits their kids, tries to force her to have sex with him, walks like
an ape, abuses and shouts at guests to the house and grabs his gun at the
slightest hint of trouble. I mean is it really any surprise to Trish that
her mom doesn't want to sleep with a fat, wife beating, child abusing white
trash scum like Mr Montelli.
0:38:05 Sonny starts coming on to his sister
Trish : "Why are you looking at me like that ?"
Sonny : "Because you're beautiful "
Trish : "I'm Beautiful ?, GRRRR (Pulls a face), No.. c'mon.... stop teasing me !"
Sonny : "No.. I mean it... get on the bed !"
Trish : "Huh?"
Sonny : "C'mon, just for one moment, We're gonna play a game"
(Trish gets onto the bed)
Sonny : "You're the beautiful model....and I'm the famous
photographer....Pose for me"
(Trish poses)
Sonny : "Y'know, Trish I think that you are probably the most beautiful girl in the world"
Trish : "Oh probably ?, You're not sure? "
Sonny : "I'm Sure... Take off your nightgown !"
Trish : "What?"
Sonny : "Just for a second"
Trish : "Ok just for a second (takes off nightgown) There! "
Sonny : "I think now I can say..You ARE the most beautiful girl in the world, .... put your hair up"
Trish : "Oh now I put my hair up ?" 
Sonny : "You have a beautiful neck !" 
Trish : "Enough"
Sonny : "No, I have a secret"
Trish : "What?"
(Sonny opens his hand to reveal a pair of panties)
Trish : "They're mine... my panties"
(At this point I always thought it would have been really funny if he had stolen Mrs Montelli's panties by mistake and Trish said "What are you doing with Mommy's knickers!!, or if he had accidentally stolen Mr Montelli's boxers.. ha ha!, you never know y'know, people who are possessed by demons do some VERY strange things!)
Sonny : "I took them from the laundry"
Trish : "But-but why?"
(Then they make love) 
This scene isn't particulary funny, but it is one of the sickest things I have ever seen in a movie and is very quoteable when me and my mates (ok, one mate who finds this movie funny!) are drunk and messing about in the pub.
Of course the idea of Sonny getting confused and stealing a pair of Mr Montelli dirty, smelly underpants is very funny indeed!
0:42:25 The demons voice says "He's here, stay away
from him" (The warning was left a bit late don't you think?, I mean
Sonny was almost down the stairs and into the front room before the demon
bothered to tell him that Father Adamski was THERE, surely a demonic force
would have fortold his arrival hours before, giving Sonny a chance to make
up a decent excuse why he had to stay in his room or had to go out while Adamski
was in the house)
0:43:30 Look at how Mrs Montelli is so desperate for Father Adamski to bless the upstairs of the house
Mrs Montelli : "Oh you MUST go Father, please...PLEASE!!"
Father Adamski : "It's alright!" (He must think
she's totally nuts!!)
0:44:08 Why does Father Adamski still go into Sonny's room when the door closed without Sonny touching it!, any rational person would think "hmm.. that's strange that the door closed by itself.. maybe I won't bother going in THERE"
0:45:44 Listen to Mrs Montelli's scream, this is probably one
of the best screams in any horror movie
0:46:45 Look at how the priest Father Adamski is talking wobbles his head when he talks, what's wrong with him?
0:47:30 Look at this scene of Father Adamski walking down the road and stopping to look at the Amityville house (this is one of the most blatant Exorcist-isms in the movie)
0:50:25 Look at how Mr Montelli is the only one not smiling at Sonny when he walks into the room for his Birthday party (the grumpy old bastard)
0:52:13 Look at how the whole family clap when Mr Montelli hugs Sonny, is affection such a rare occurence for this man that it's rewarded by applause when it finally happens?
0:52:28 Watch how the Montelli family stand there, glued to
the spot, staring at Sonny and don't move (or even change their facial expressions)
until the guests arrive. 
0:52:34 The demonic voice says "Look at them, They're
pathetic animals...They'd be better off if you killed them!, Don't you think
so?, ha ha ha..., YES..you think so!"
0:52:10 Look at the guy who walks into the house smiling inanly, (he is wearing a blue checked shirt , a blue woollen jacket and he has brown hair). It's as if he is thinking "Look at me....I'm in a film"
0:53:53 Look at the girl walking towards the camera stuffing her face with cake...ha ha ha, you'd think that if you were going to eat cake in an internationally released movie you would at least adopt some decent table manners. (I bet she ate the whole cake all to herself and was running off so no-one would notice).
0:54:05 Have you noticed that Mr Montelli is the only one drinking alcohol at the party, what's the betting that he'll get drunk and go nuts and start screaming at everyone and hitting the party guests (especially Mr "Look at me..I'm in a film").
(I hope this scene was actually filmed and will turn up in a special edition sometime, I would LOVE to see that!!)
0:58:53 - Mrs Montelli tells her husband that she won't make
love to him because "It's a shame",
HUH??, What an odd thing to say
0:59:01 - Have you noticed that at the top of the screen in this bit of the film there is a bizzare black shape (it's in the middle at the very top of the screen). It stays there until Jan sees her mother lying dying on the landing.
Maybe there was something hanging down in front of the camera lens when this scene was filmed.
0:59:38 - Look at Rutyana Alda's bad acting when she dies (talk
about overacting) 
1:00:30 - Look at how Jan Montelli's feet twitch after she is shot, this is really sick!
1:02:02 - Have you noticed that the relationship between Father Adamski & Father Tom is a lot like the relationship between Father Dyer and Father Karras in The Exorcist. Just an observation.
1:04:34 - Look at the car parked behind the ambulance as Father Adamski & Father Tom walk up to the house, It looks like Mr Montelli's car with a police light stuck on the roof.
Maybe this was to lower the budget (or maybe I'm mistaken and it looks nothing like it)
1:05:23 - Notice how Trish Montelli's eyes move slightly when
she is supposed to be dead (Thanks to Lynn Musser for spotting this) 
1:05:37 - Look at the police lights reflected in the window, It looks like Jodi the Pig is looking out of the window (I'm pretty sure this was a deliberate reference to the first movie (The Amityville Horror).
1:06:33 - Look at the tramp in the green bobble hat sat down in the police station
1:17:52 - Look at the way Sonny passes out in the courtroom
1:18:00 - Father Adamski's head pops into the scene in a really funny way, It's as if someone had a picture of James Olsen's face on a stick and stuck in front of the camera.
1:19:03 - In this part of the film when Father Adamski is shouting
at the other priest in the car, the other priest looks up in a bizzare way,
it looks like he is trying to remember his next line or something.
1:19:15 - When the second priest gets into the car and says
"Now I understand why all the parishoners are complaining about him",
the first priest says "SHH!" to him even though he had already stopped
talking a few seconds ago.
1:23:03 - Look at Father Adamski's face just after he hits Turner with the gun. OUCH !!
1:33:32 - This part where Adamski says "Let it be me my
God, not him", is a blatant rip off of the end of The Exorcist
1:35:55 - Why is Turner in the car outside the Amityville house, surely if he had just been knocked unconcious he would need a good few hours to recover.
1:37:45 - ROLL END CREDITS
Hope you had as much fun as I did (and still do)